Showing posts with label Fresno. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Fresno. Show all posts

Monday, February 8, 2010

Fresno: Haterz Be Hatin' Cuz They JEALOUS!!!



tee don't see this as a bad thing, but Fresno was just named 'The Drunkest City in America'. U know tee had somethin' 2 do with dat in her pre-'habz days! Still, it'z opened up tha door 4 yet anotha round of 559-hatin'.

Last October, we was named 'The Dumbest City in America'!

Whatevz! Laughlin, NV is WAAAAAY dumber den we iz. & haz anyone been 2 tha South (tee don't wanna fall back on stereotypez...but they IZ the most accurate thing to go by)??

The haterz can keep hatin' cuz Fresno keepz it real and they just J-E-A-L-O-U-S anywayz. Plus we iz used 2 tha Haterade and have delevoped a taste 4 it.

Some other lists Fresno has topped:

-Most Dangerous (2007)
-Most K.Fed Infested (2005)
-Biggest Meth Problem (2004)
-Wonkiest Eyes (2002)
-Saddest City (2000)
-Worst Dressed (2000)
-Worst Tourism Catchphrase: "Fresno, CA: No Longer Just The Place Where Most of L.A.'s Missing Hookers Are Found Dead!" (1998)
-Least Likely To Succeed (1995)
-Most Embarrassing (1993)
-Biggest Contender For Pity Sex With A Better City (1992)
-Easiest City To 'Nuke' (If The President Had To Choose A City) (1990)
-Most Promising (1896)

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Ya Gurl'z Startin' a L.A.M.E. Blog!!

So 2 all U haterz who said tee was illiterate, U only 1/2 right!!

tee only got 2 tha 3rd grade but dat's ALL U NEED!

My stoopid management said tee needz 2 connect w/ fanz after my multiple rehab stintz & court appearances. Tha last time tee releazed muzic, Lady Gaga was still studying how 2 steal her style from famous Fresno drag queen Na$ti Delicious, Miley was still saving sex 4 tha 3rd date and Britney was on top of tha world...shavin' her head & gettin' admitted to glamorous psychiatric wards.

Butt ya gurl is ready 2 step back in2 tha light and illuminate yo' azzez on what it really meanz 2 be a seXXXy popstar!

But first, tee'z gonna score herself some delicous Chick-fil-A

Om Nom Nom Nom!

Mos' GLAMOROUS chicken restaraunt eva!